Are You Tuned In?

Image

It happens all the time, doesn’t it? You’re rushing around, trying to leave the house and the keys go missing. Or your glasses. Or the mail you need to drop off on your way to wherever you’re going once you find your keys. 

(Just today, a piece of mail went totally missing around here — a mystery I got bogged down in until I realized it would turn up if it turned up, but I had other things to do!)

 
In those moments, you are not tuned in to yourself. The tendency is to get more frantic and less centered. Which of course is not conducive to finding whatever it is you’ve lost.
 
You know how sometimes you struggle to remember a word or a name, but the more you struggle, the less it comes to you? And then, just as you’re going to bed, or in the middle of an unrelated conversation, BAM! In comes the missing information.
 
There’s something magical that happens when you rest.
 
You shift into different brainwave states, where creativity and deeper consciousness reside.
 
You come back to yourself in ways you didn’t even realize had been lost.
 
I know it isn’t always easy to find space to rest when you’re trying so hard to hold it all together (or perhaps space out as a way to antidote your stress). But it’s really the best thing you can do.  Try something different like:
  • stop what you’re struggling to figure out and take a tea break or step outside and put your feet on the earth.
  • lay on your back on the floor and put your legs up the wall — place your tush as close to the wall as you can (you can do this on your bed if the floor doesn’t work) and rest your legs on the wall to relax your back and ease your mind.
  • take a creativity break — doodle, play a musical instrument if you have one, write yourself a love note, pull out your paints if you have them. Shift from primarily left brain to right brain activity for a while.
Here’s my little love note to you — a chance to chill out while listening to Monday night’s free Meditation For Women teleclass. The feedback about it was so overwhelmingly positive that I wanted to share it with you. Simply click HERE and enjoy!
Advertisements

Never Mind Happy, Get Real!

Image

 

I read a wonderful blog post by a colleague earlier today on a concept which is dear to my heart, particularly as a wellness coach specializing in stress reduction: striving for happiness is overrated and a bit off point for a real and satisfying life. I’ve chased that carrot myself at times and it’s not that tasty after all…

Happiness without end is an unrealistic and topsy-turvy goal. The constant focus on happiness — how to get it, what makes us feel it (or what we think will, which doesn’t always when we actually attain it), how we can hold on to it, makes life into one long exercise in striving for specific material things and special experiences.
 
What is more helpful and satisfying in the long run is to simply be REAL. What does that mean exactly?
  • Focusing on what is currently happening and allowing yourself to relax into what is.
  • Experiencing a sense of wonder and gratitude for the large and small gifts in your life; a hot shower in the morning, a call from a beloved family member, a hand to hold at a rough time, tender green shoots bursting through apparently solid pavement, as well as the special family trip or new car.
  • Letting yourself feel sad when you feel sad, angry when you are angry, tender when you feel hurt. This doesn’t mean that you wallow (although sometimes a little wallowing can feel good, in which case enjoy the heck out of it!). It doesn’t mean that you suffer. It means that you ALLOW ALL THAT IS TRUE TO LIVE IN AND MOVE THROUGH YOU.
It’s by trying to stop or deny or resist that we get into trouble. It’s by trying to slap a happy face over troubling times that we push the trouble further in, like a festering wound. 
 
Sometimes in the seemingly upbeat choice to focus on gratitude instead, all we do is create a false positive that eventually backfires into a bigger hurt than the original wound. 
 
When you focus more on getting real than on chasing happy, the natural outcome is greater satisfaction, grace and yes, even joy. True happiness comes not from feeling good all of the time, but from living in flow with all that arises. You can be sick and still be happy. You can be blessed and still be miserable. It’s all a matter of how your inner soil is fertilized and tended so things can grow and die away in their natural cycles.
 
One of the best way I know to deepen your natural capacity to hold all of life without exploding or collapsing is through meditationIt’s one of my passions and something I’ve learned to incorporate into my life with wonderful results, yet I find it’s often misunderstood or misrepresented.
Curious how you can make it work for you too? Already doing it but open to some fresh perspectives and insights, or just interested in the topic? Then please consider joining me for the free tele class on Monday, April 28th: http://www.heartofselfcare.com/meditationforwomen.html

Have You Claimed Your Sovereignty?

Image

What does it mean to claim sovereignty over your life? There are many definitions, some having to do with claiming power over others…but the ones I relate to and am using here are: enjoying autonomy; superlative; of the most exalted kind. When you claim sovereignty over your life:

  • It doesn’t mean that you no longer show up for others. It means you show up with a cup you’ve already filled with your own goodness.
  • It means you know the value of spending quality time with yourself, nurturing your inner muse and inviting her to play in the realms that light up your soul.
  • It means being willing to have others feel disappointed because you’ve staked a claim on serving yourself first (kind of like that air mask/airplane thing, only not just in moments of absolute panic). Even if that looks as small as taking 15 seconds to breathe and center before picking up the phone when you see it’s your kid/spouse/parent.
Being sovereign doesn’t come easily to most of us. Oh it seems like we are doing what we like (at least during our “free time”) and that we are the ones running our own show (after taking care of the kids/spouse/parent/dog/cat/gerbil). But are you truly in alignment and at peace with each part of your being, each nuance of mood and response to outer influences?
 
Sovereignty is an inside job. 
 
It’s a series of moment-to-moment decisions, awarenesses and actions. It is sometimes seen by others as selfish, and not supported by the dominant culture even while it is touted in ads, movies and media outlets. We admire people who take a strong stand and go against the grain as individuals, like Julia Butterfly Hill living in her tree — we just don’t always know how to be that for ourselves! And it doesn’t have to look that dramatic.
 
One of the main keys to this kingdom is meditative awareness. Building a sustainable meditation practice is akin to building a life raft — it will take you to distant, unseen shores and keep you from going under when the waves get rough.
 
There are many ways to build this raft and make it one that supports you. And there are many master builders from which to learn. Who are some of your favorites and what tools have you gathered that help you keep yourself afloat? 
 
You may have lots of tools and still not be reaping the most effective ways to use them, or feel like you don’t have any tools at all. I’ve been in both camps and can totally relate! If either of these applies, I hope you will consider joining me for this *free* class.
Meditation for Women: Why It’s Different, How to Make It Work For You
A Free One-Hour Teleclass…Learn More HERE 
  • Have you tried to meditate but felt you just couldn’t get it? 
  • Does it seem like something you ought to do because you’ve been told it’s great at reducing stress, only to feel more stressed out because you couldn’t empty your mind of thoughts?
  • Do you feel like you were born without the meditation gene (as one student described it)?
Meditation can have a huge range of flavors, textures and colors. And it’s as natural as breathing. You’ve most likely been doing it for years without recognizing the power or knowing how to harness it as a force for good in your life.
 
So many women have been asking about meditation in the past few months. And my own practice has shifted and deepened because of some new information I’ve discovered.
 
Join me on Monday, April 28th for this one hour tele seminar, guaranteed to shift how you experience meditation. Find out more and register by clicking HERE.

Have You Met the Angel of Possibility?

Image

This morning I met the Angel of Possibility in my meditation. Now, despite the image above, I don’t really believe that angels have wings (although some might). They are more like specific densities of energy that have unique flavors and evoke different feelings.

So here’s how it happened: just after dawn, quiet and content from watching the sunrise through our big east-facing window. Candles lit, essential oils infusing my cells with Valor, Joy and Highest Potential (if you’re curious, you can find out about them HERE), mouth still savoring the taste of barely sweetened organic earl grey tea.
It was one of those meditations when my mind was fairly still, and when it did float off into thoughts, they were small — though not insignificant — and didn’t drag me down into any whirlpools or float me up into the clouds. I was in my body, with my breath, and became aware of a very distinct presence.
And the presence brought thoughts like “it’s time to offer more meditation classes” and “you can delight and inspire students by bringing in ______ and ______.” They landed with softness and brought me into a deeper sense of union.
The tightness I’d felt yesterday as I struggled to make contact with others (a major phone tag/missed connection day) was gone, replaced by the sense that anything, truly, was possible — as long as I showed up from this quiet, inwardly congruent place.
I believe we all have angels that are aching to be be sensed and acknowledged. They exist to support us and remind us that we are truly never alone. The Angel of Possibility is one. The Angel of Tenderness is another. They are countless, more than I could ever be aware of — and I suspect you know some of yours, even if you haven’t hung out with them in a long while.
 
As it says in the Talmud, every blade of grass has an angel that bends over it and whispers “Grow, grow!”
So, take a moment right now to turn away from your screen, breathe deep into your belly, and invite your angel-of-the-moment to whisper what you most need to hear. I guarantee she’s waiting.